You’re likely wondering, what is it? I would tell you but I don’t think you would believe me immediately.
So let’s start with the background. I’m often writing these blogs in place of having a journal. The reason for journaling is because I want my son to read something when he grows up, read something about the time where he wasn’t able to maintain an archive of information, or let alone manage writing a sentence with a pencil.
Fraud Guarantee, is the name of a company. But let’s discuss how we got here. There’s more to this story.
Over the past few weeks, the non-stop chatter about Trump’s Impeachment has been ground shaking,to say the least.
But rather than giving my opinion, it seems rather important to keep it about the facts.
Data, data visualization, that cool stuff.
Let’s circle around and pretend we understand the “Washington Post” recent survey…
Which I found them sharing with Googlesheets, *sigh*.
It was a rather large view of data.
Try to make sense of this dump. Even with visualizing the data, it’s a rather big matrix of information…
You can find the data here. Or their release of the survey here.
With that said… the latest “Fraud Guarantee”
I want to say, I warned you. Below, it’s all interesting stuff.
When reading things like this.. you start to think. There’s nothing that can top this particular grain of information. It was so interesting, I took a screenshot and shared it on Facebook. It was the first time I’ve shared anything on facebook since I decided to stop using the app.
Fraud Guarantee is a new Twitter trend…because that’s the name of a business Giuliani…
Wait wait… Who cares about this guy, what the hell.
Someone called their name Fraud Guarantee.
So, yes, I’m thinking, “what’s Fraud Guarantee”… I must see!
Yet, I’m awkwardly found myself watching Giuliani.
Come on
“Even as he worked with Mr. Parnas’s company, Fraud Guarantee, Mr. Giuliani increasingly relied on Mr. Parnas …” https://t.co/Y90Y25coN3
I will admit, I don’t know who Giuliani is, or what he looks like, but I can hear things and I can see stuff. So here’s this.
A video of Giuliani @ Trump Hotel… Can you make this stuff up?
Maybe Rudy Giuliani shouldn't have made this video of himself and his Ukraine co-conspirators Orb Parnas and Igor Fruman WHILE they were planning their getaway, at the Trump Hotel. #EqualityTownHall Fraud Guarantee. ; https://t.co/acflE9oQtH pic.twitter.com/jeLGYUCvOm
In this video, are a couple of arrested people says the New York Times.
Wild.
So, I guess #FraudGuarantee is more of an open forum to hammer this trial conviction through the courts. Where millions of people are starting to get in on this, which boom… It’s a trend.
It’s hard to think this is happening.
The men, Ukrainian-born Lev Parnas and Igor Fruman, originally from Belarus, are accused of conspiring to “circumvent the federal laws against foreign interference by engaging in a scheme to funnel foreign money to candidates for federal and State office,” according to a four-count indictment in the Southern District of New York. Two other men, David Correia and Andrey Kukushkin, also face charges
Think about it, is life upset? Social media is rather complex, blogging isn’t simple, hosting could be easier, buying domains isn’t easy nor is migrating or selling them. It’s a ramp up.
If you’re willing to learn. Life can get easier or more complicated rather quickly.
No duh material.
I threw away my favorite hobby & life goal to learn tech & support my fam long term
For some reason I thought I needed to focus for the last 10+ years, ignore music, turn it into a x-hobby, and box it up.
Sometimes it’s okay to put a pause on things. With out pausing video games, I would still be playing video games and not learning at night.
I’ve learned putting a pause for a long time will start to creep into other portions of life.
Similar to not stretching enough, now you pulled your neck, or not running enough, now you got a big ass.
Since 8 years old, I’ve played classical instruments, since my mid 20’s, I decided to take a break and focus on work. I thought, “if I worked hard, it will pay off, I will have my own studio, more time to work on my music, and never sell out.”
I worked – non-stop- for ages. It paid off, but some days I just need a microphone, headphones, my family, and a delay pedal.
Building a music studio was everything for me in college
Building a music studio was everything for me in college, and it was everything for me not that long ago.
Another important factor for me in college, was “one up my parents”… do what I can to be better. I wanted to ensure I had a job, that can be remote, coffee shop, or somewhere in a distant country.
Me, growing up in a tiny town in Louisiana, everyone my age wanted to escape, we disappeared into our rooms, our imaginations often leading us to distant lands beyond Louisiana.
What changed?
I love Louisiana, I love visiting, I love the weather, I love the food, I love the people. I would love to live in a small town in Louisiana again.
As a child – I was hungry for traveling – seeing big building – flying on a plane.
After seeing those things and feeling forced to live within that lifestyle, you start to want more distance from the flying, the traveling, the big buildings and busy days.
Finding time for relaxing, in a calm environment, without the big city echoing in the distance becomes important.
Which is one of many reasons why i love living in austin texas! I’m a bit of an alien, weirdo, gamer, etc.
Time away from the screen
Without the light of the city covering the stars, you can see planets, satellites, stars, galaxies. And we all get the same warm fuzzy feeling once you start to notice the size and distance beyond our world, built into a 360 degree view port, without an on or off button.
It’s a good feeling to consider, “maybe it’s not the worst day in my life because I dropped my cellphone, maybe it’s a good day because a large space rock isn’t exploding the planet.”
– Tyler Garrett
That fuzzy feeling.. like going to the beach on vacation, getting in the water feels weird at first, but after a few hours, you don’t want to leave.
You’re connected to the world around you. Almost as if you’re an alien, found home, and now you want to call it your home.
Similar to going skiing or snowboarding. At first, you’re terrible. Crash a lot, hurt yourself. But once you get the hang of it, you feel right at home.
When you feel like alien, different from everyone, I’m learning you need to take life with a grain of salt.
Life is upsetting with every swipe of facebook, instagram, etc. so, maybe less time on social media is a good starting point.
What changed for my music production?
I had a kid? President? Media? Married? Started a company for word of mouth equity, it crashed and burned, almost lost my home due to people being terrible humans… Started another company….
Sounds like a lot of pressure.
But what changed?
I learned a lot… I’ve been locked into learning, screen time. It felt important to be able to figure out how to find people looking for services I can offer.
In the process of learning this, I learned about searching. I learned people are all searching for something.
My theory, we are are all searching for a tribe, a place to call home, and once we enter a new tribe of people who don’t have a lot of hobbies, it’s easy to be looked at as an alien.
Did you know there’s a tribe of people dedicated to your passion projects and all you need to do is find them. Twitter, Instagram, having a blog, and meeting people in the real world are great ways to establish your tribes.
And if nothing fits in your area, maybe you need to build a tribe online.
Focusing on a few things…
Everyone told me, “you’re too spread out, you’re doing too much, you need to focus on what you’re good at.”
My thoughts, “I’m bored with your filters and way of thinking.”
What I’m noticing is, I’m comparing myself to other people.
It’s normal to compare yourself to others, we all want to relate to each other to find common ground, and we all want to be a part of a tribe. It’s our micro process to survival.
“A tribe is a group of people connected to one another, connected to a leader, and connected to an idea. For millions of years, human beings have been part of one tribe or another. A group needs two things to be a tribe: a shared interest and a way to communicate.” ― Seth Godin, Tribes: We Need You to Lead Us
For millions of years humans have been apart of a tribe or the other. The tribes learn to communicate, and if the communication pattern is filtering your life, it’s time to find a new tribe!
Not all tribes are built for helping each other, take what you can from the tribe, and leave the rest in the trash.
You’re you. Not every piece of advice will work for you. This includes advice from friends, family, people you think are “blood tribe.” Sometimes they are jealous of your youth, looks, talents, and that’s not the right tribe for you.
You need a tribe who supports you, not everything you share – people are busy and that’s not probable.
You need a group of folks you can confide in, a tribe of people who understand your turmoil….
A tribe of people who know how to direct you to focusing on using your time to benefit you or others around you. Sometimes we need tribe in person, digitally, but end of day you need a tribe.
Being the alien in the tribe means you’re the smartest person, you don’t need to be in that tribe, go find a tribe where you’re not the coolest, best, smartest, and go stand next to that person, do what you can to learn and help them.
For some reason I thought focusing on a couple of things made sense.
Focusing on Tableau consulting, focusing on digital marketing, focusing on web development, focusing on user persona, graphic design, tech tech tech tech technology… techy tech tech.
Never do I consider re-focusing on music production. I built musicblip and stopped because I thought I needed to monetize it. But that was not why I built musicblip, that was advice from other people who did not know why I built musicblip. I built musicblip to give back, it is was never a goal to turn it into a massive money machine.
So, what changed?
My tribe. My influences. But that tribe is dead, so why don’t I go back to my hobbies?
Cutting out passion hobbies for LIFE, WORK, FAMILY… is like cutting off your good arm.
It becomes a phantom limb.
I removed the limb thinking a “sane” minds would prevail. But all I gained was a painful neck, repeated work stress injuries, repetitive reaching to computer and typing & clicking for prolonged periods of time.
What am I missing?… Oh my outlet.
Music production helped me learn a lot about workflow, working smart, optimizing how I work, and it allowed me to take my learnings into my professional life.
I would tell analogies about how making bad music is normal, just like building dashboards, they always suck in the beginning but after a good bit of time making crap dashboards, you 1 day make a good polished piece of crap, and it it impresses everyone.
That is the dumbest analogy every, but when I say something that simple, obvious, easy to connect,… well it becomes easy to become a part of this micro tribe. A group of my peers, customers, friends… Captivated by my story telling.
Having an outlet makes you more human.
Having an outlet makes you seem like you have a life outside of work.
People don’t like robots, sometimes you need to fake this part of you if you’re struggling to tribe up in micro meetings.
Aliens find friends online easy, but we can’t live online.
Living online does not work, they make netflix documentaries about it.
It’s OK to make digital mentors, friends, etc… It’s important to learn to be able to network and a few hours a week – learning from someone online – is not a negative.
And if you haven’t taken a break from Facebook, give yourself a chance.
Staring at the computer, to drive a digital needle, based on an algorithm I believe is easy because I can build the same solution…
Does not mean it’s a good usage of time, it means it’s a usage of time.
As an alien, who plays mystical instruments since childhood. Sending vibrations into the world needs to continue to ensure I’m apart of my history tribe. The tribe you build for yourself through your experiences and hard work. Often times these grinds are attributed to your ability to tell the story of your success in the future. We can share online, we can make music online, but we don’t come up with the best ideas when sitting around online.
Often the best ideas come from silence, doing boring stuff, exercise,…
Be okay with your work being stolen, and stealing good work.
Long ago, my work was stolen. It was stolen because it was good, not because they wanted to piss me off, frustrate me, or keep me from producing. Likely not the case.
So, I stopped making music. Turned off my soundcloud. Had a great excuse to stop making music.
But, my removed arm is needing to be re-attached.
I feel more alien not having my hobby in my life, it’s time to start changing the way I think.
Don’t wait until you know who you are to get started.
Write the book you want to read. (swap book for music)
Use your hands.
Side projects and hobbies are important.
The secret: do good work and share it with people.
Geography is no longer our master.
Be nice. (The world is a small town.)
Be boring. (It’s the only way to get work done.)
Creativity is subtraction.
I never made music for anyone but myself.
I made music I wanted to listen to at the time.
I made music I wanted to listen to.
However culture, media, life, movies, tv, school, college… they had to teach me right from wrong…
We should not be mentally fighting, physically fighting, always working towards consumerism and destructive behaviors due to frustrations with my neighbor.
Always looking to right wrongs, like a super hero on the internet… Just like superman, who was an alien.
Do you ever feel frustrated or hyper connected to events?
I compare getting upset about people cheating in digital marketing, to landscaping…
It’s easier than explaining why I’m upset about politics.
My competitors cheat, it makes marketing more complex.
Every competitor of mine is cheating, I was upset for a long time….
I fought about it, I was not being kind. I was upset, trying to right a wrong…
There’s a positive side, it did a few things.
It taught me about traffic, it taught me about cheating, and instead of worrying about this cold lemon squeeze that life is handing me, I grab that lemon, shield my eye from the drip, and squeeze the mother f*** out of it.
That’s how you make SUPER LEMONS.
Think about the last thing that upset you…
Are you getting a positive return from being upset about this political, police beating, knock out video, sex tape, celebrity, boxing, mma, etc….
When was the last time someone paid you to watch netflix?
Do you earn money from being upset about life?
Let me use an analogy…
What is a weed in the grass? We know it’s there but do we need to point it out and make a big deal? What can you learn from this roadblock?
Do we need to peel apart the reason for the weed?
Do we need to call attention to the weed?
Do we need to think about how the weed will spread?
Notice all these internal dialogs and let them pass. You don’t need to greet the door of every concern in your life.
We need to shut the computer off, go outside, pick the stupid weed, pick another 10 weeds while you are at it.
Go throw it in the right bucket, don’t sweep it under, otherwise you’re gonna have a bunch of dead weeds under there.
Start making your digital life more analog or you will fade away. And it’s not the kind of drowning you need. Covered in lemon juice, hooked on netflix, worried about the weeds growing in your front yard.
Carve out a schedule, spend 30 minutes alone without asking for next steps, without solving problems, take a deep breath and fucking chill. The world will give you every answer you need. The thing you’re looking for, is you.
If you’re upset with how things are, wishing for more…
Go steal someones hard work, make it your own, they will never notice you stealing their work, and give yourself a limitations to getting your work completed.
You don’t have unlimited time, you don’t have unlimited money, and “why didn’t I think of that?” Is a few steps away from, “I just thought of something better.”
I stole all the cheaters cheats, I squeeze the life out of the lemon life gave me, I cloned that lemon, now I have super lemons. Super cheats. Super life hacks.
The first 3 hours of your day can dictate how your life turns out. And this often begins with the very first thing that you decide to put in your brain. You can either start you day with junk food for the brain (the internet, distracting apps, etc) or you can start the day with healthy food for the brain (reading, meditation, journaling, exercising, etc). When you start the day with junk food for the brain, you put yourself at a self imposed handicap that inhibits your ability to get into flow and prevents you from doing deep work. When you start the day with health food for your brain, the exact opposite happens.
Anytime
I start my day with junk food for the brain, the quality of the day
goes down. I’m less happy, focused, and productive. I spend a ton of
time on the internet and don’t get any real work done. But if I start my
day with health food for the brain, I find that my mood is better, I’m
happier, more focused and productive.
Why Junk Food for the Brain is Toxic
If
you woke up in the morning, smoked a cigarette, ate 2 donuts, and
washed it down with 2 cups of coffee, it wouldn’t be surprising that
your physical performance is subpar. You’re probably not going to go out
and run 2 miles or win a prize fight after that kind of breakfast.
But
when it comes to our brain, we’re not nearly as mindful about the idea
that we should treat the information we consume like the food we eat.
“When
you wake up you’re in this theta alpha state and you’re highly
suggestible. Every like, comment, share, you get this dopamine fix and
it’s literally rewiring your brain. What you’re smart device is doing
especially if that’s the first thing you grab when you wake up and
you’re in this alpha theta state, is rewiring your brain to be
distracted.” — @Jim Kwik
If we start our days by checking email, instagram, or the internet, we keep reinforcing the behavior of distraction until it becomes our new habit. Some of the smartest behavioral scientist and designers in the world have worked really hard to make sure that their products are addictive, habit forming, and only provide you with a temporary sense of fulfillment so the you are always jonesing for your next fix.
And a significant amount of what’s on the internet is nothing more than junk food for the brain.
Why Healthy Food for the Brain is So Powerful
If
you woke up in the morning and had a really healthy breakfast, that
revitalized and energized you, you’d likely hit the gym or a morning run
expecting to be at your peak. The same goes for our brains.
When we start the day with health food for the brain, instead of a self imposed handicap, we give ourselves a massive competitive advantage. On the days when I religiously follow through on the 8-step daily routine that allowed me to write multiple books and 100’s of articles, my productivity goes through the roof, flow happens effortlessly, and I end up doing a lot of deep work. The idea for this article was actually the result of giving my brain some health food to start the day.
I did 20 minutes of meditation
I did almost an hour of reading
I wrote in my journal for 30 minutes
When I turned on my computer, I blocked distractions and started writing.
When
you start the day with health food for your brain, you don’t end up
depleting your willpower, and as a result you get more done in far less
time.
So how exactly do you start the day with health food for
your brain? To wean ourselves off of junk food for the brain, we have to
actually replace it with something else.
Don’t use your devices in the morning
Smartphones
distract us whether they are on, off, in our pockets, or on a table,
and they command our attention even when they are not our own. The best
solution for preventing smartphone distraction is to remove it from the
picture altogether — Steve Magness
If your
refrigerator or pantry is filled with junk food, you’re going to be much
more likely to eat it. Same goes for your devices. If you turn them on
first thing in the morning, you’re going to be much more likely to give
into the sources of distraction that they make accessible. The only
thing that I use my phone for in the morning is a 20 minute meditation
with the Calm app. After that, I take it out of the room I’m working in.
Set aside 20 minutes to meditate
Reality
as we know it occurs in the space between stimulus and response. An
event happens and we make it mean something. But this happens so fast
that we don’t question the validity of the meaning we’ve assigned to an
event, situation or circumstance. The way to take control of the meaning
is to slow that process down, and the way to slow that process down is
with meditation.
I have a natural tendency to overreact or make
situations more stressful than they really are. But as my meditation
practice has deepened, I’ve noticed a profound energetic shift. Many of
the things that would have previously rattled me don’t. On the mornings
that I follow through with my 20 minutes of meditation, I’m able to
focus more easily, and I don’t crave sources of distraction nearly as
much
The most successful people I’ve interviewed on Unmistakable
Creative, all of the peak performance books I’ve read, spiritual
teachings, and many billionaires all reference the role that a daily
meditation habit is played in their life. That was convincing enough
evidence for me to make it a daily habit.
Read books, not the internet
When
we read on the internet, we tend to scan more than we read. How often
do you sit around at a dinner party discussing the amazing article you
read on the internet? Almost all of my ideas for what I want to write
about have come from books. Almost none of them have come from reading
articles on the internet. I’ve even found in my cases that when I read a
physical book that I previously read on Kindle, I tend to get far more
value out of it.
Years ago when I interviewed Julien Smith,
he said “I don’t read blogs. I read books.” And he had one of the most
popular blogs on the internet. I stopped reading blogs, started reading
books, and as a result became a more prolific writer. After watching the
prolific career that Ryan Holiday
has built, and observing his reading habits, I decided to follow his
lead. Believe me the irony that you’re reading this on the internet is
not lost on me.
Do 1 hour of Deep Work
One
hour of deep work is a form of self care. It’s incredibly fulfilling.
It’s an affirmation to yourself and to the universe that you value
yourself and your time. You can accomplish extraordinary things in just one focused hour a day of uninterrupted creation time.
With deep work, you get disproportionate results from your efforts.
It’s the 80–20 rule at work. 80% of your output will come from 20
percent of your effort.
Just some food for thought. When I started
writing this article I set my distraction blocker for 45 minutes. As I
wrote this sentence I decided to do a check on my word count and
realized I’d written over 1200 words in about 35 minutes. That’s what
happens when you combine flow and deep work together
One last thing to consider. What are you really getting out of checking Facebook, Instagram, or anything on your phone when you wake up in the morning? Is it making you happier or more successful in any way at all? If you added up all the time you possibly waste over the course of a year on this behavior, it’s likely you could write a book, build a business, or learn an instrument, all of which are going to do far more for the quality of your life than the temporary dopamine fix your phone provides.
If you say start typing a couple more times than your competitor, you’re going to confuse a robot and the algorithm will rank you #1.
There’s no tricks…
Just a lot of opinionated people who aren’t very technical, offering lots of bad content about how to get traffic.
Usually everyone PAYS to play.
But if you don’t pay… you can earn traffic by simply typing and blogging on other websites.
Seriously, it’s like you will start ranking for “start typing to get traffic.”
Most people don’t realize if you start typing to get traffic, you will get traffic because robots will have ranked you for start typing.
Notice, we can do different things, like say get traffic and start typing. They key is I’m doing something… I’m doing more than nothing, I’m doing more than scrolling on facebook. I’m not living my life by staring at someone else’s meal from yesterday…
You could blog about super complex API stuff, like I tend to do…
You can pretend like people understand your niche, circle stuff in pink like that will help…
Ultimately you need to type about stuff that isn’t really complex.
Making stuff for the masses is easy for everyone to understand you know what you’re talking about, and don’t need to stress the mechanics of how a clock turns.
A dashboard is a way for me to easy explain the data…
I can avoid talking of the complexities of prepping data from an API perspective, how I connected it to linkedin, how I had to parse data at a row level to answer questions I had about LinkedIn Job data….
None of that stuff matters.
PEOPLE just want to see the time…
But if you’re not willing to show them any of that…
Trust me the facebook group, facebook ad, stuff.. Will fade.
Pay to play will not be a resume booster.
Unless you’re doing something really techie…
Start typing to get traffic from robots first…
Robots need to find you and eventually they will. Make sure after a header, you talk about the header too, like start typing to get traffic from robots first – or you’re not going to get traffic ever…
Really simple stuff… I started typing on medium. It’s free.
I type about whatever, coding, anything really…
And now I’m ranking on Google? Only people beating me are full of advertisements, which is likely because they are cheating to rank.
But that’s the wild west in ranking, shitty websites beat websites without a single advertisement. That’s how the game is played and everyone is cheating.
TIP:
Using bold also tells robots you’re serious about the two words.
And all you did was start typing about something.
Anything will do.
Putting it in double quotes can also help indicate the topic of the entire blog, but mostly, you want to say it in the title, the URL, the first paragraph, and maybe in a header or two below!
If you round it off with the keywords again, like how important it is to type anything, and keep trying.
It took 3 years before people really started sharing my content. It takes time to learn the internet when it’s full of fake accounts, fake consultancies, and scammers.
People ask me, “what do you like about your synth?”
“How is this synth, compared to that synth?”
It’s a lot like asking me what the best Tableau consulting company is, I have no idea really, but I think I don’t suck at it too much. I’m willing to blog about that stuff, emotionally charged at times but always willing to go back and edit after I push out 5k words about a bunch of nothing usually…
Emotionally charged, similar to my analog stack.
Not like a tech stack, that i normally discuss. But it’s not that different too.
Having worked for every synth, never gifted a synth, and worked long hours, years, decades… (to earn my synths)
Fighting to turn on an analog synth, patiently getting better and better in my Daw of choice, ableton. It feels good to have them together. They are a team, an emotional group of analog synthesizers.
“What do you like about your synths?”
I love the journey to get synths, my life story.
As I love each synth, equally.
Moog synths, or any synth, is a big deal. They don’t grow on trees and it takes a lot of work to own your own music studio. I set myself on a mission in college, to build my own studio, and my next mission in life is applying myself, and making music. But the journey did not start here, it started many years ago, playing flute in Louisiana, when I was 8 years old. But that’s not what this blog is about. Let’s get back to it.
“What do you like most about your synths?”
Impossible question – every user experiences a Moog synth differently.
You might find yourself deep into the complexities of a Moog Sub37, more enjoy the modular retreat, the engineer aspect, of a Mother 32.
What is a moog synth?
A moog synth is something we teach and learn from.
A moog synth is a hand crafted creature, built by engineers, product developers, project managers, developers, admins, managers, and thought leaders. Moog is more than a synth to the users. Here’s my Moog story.
What’s a moog synth, to we.
We teach you to pulsate with the beat, without FX, allowing you to completely live.
Moog synths need air but under the right restrictions or limitations, it will quickly impress any artist.
But some times we compress our Moog Synths…
We compress the mother fudge out of you…
Other times.
We remove the compression.
And let it win… all while trying to find that perfect balance.
Moog synths sound best with friends.
Moog Synths are like little creatures
Living and breathing through out the track, and through out our studios.
We are still learning about each of you too, some of these synths beyond our moog synth, for some, are actually older than us.
Most days, these moog synths teach us to be better producers, better musicians, better artists, better people.
We have a weird thing with our personal synths, little personal pets, little creatures that require love & attention… and drum machines, it’s like a relationship.
We work to keep them living. We provide electricity, they provide emotions.
So, we try not to give our Moog synths limitations…
We all love the experience, having a Moog synth – is ownership of a hand crafted, or hand repaired, creature.
Some synths, simply living on the edge of death because the previous owner didn’t take care.
But now Moog synth, now you are in my studio, we will take good care of you.
Welcome to the party.
You can check out my free loop and sample business, @ www.musicblip.com. Starting to build a music label within Musicblip as of last week. Excited to release more soon.
Here’s 5 ways to pretend to get over the Google+ shutdown.
Pretend to care about baths
Pretend to care about yoga
Pretend to care about yourself
Pretend to care about other people
Pretend to care about a hipster
#1 Pretend to care about baths.
Pretending to care about baths is one thing, but also pretend others care about it, by sharing pictures of yourself on twitter, or instagram. Because everyone is interested.
After several years enjoying yoga for the healthy benefits, I’m starting to realize the monetizing missed because I was focused on getting healthy and flexible. There’s an entire world of people who do yoga, share it on social media, and pretend it’s big deal.
I challenge you to pretend to care about yoga, and in a big way.
Change someones way of yoga-ing.
Make up a new yogi-wordi.
Inspire some one go yoguh.
Pretending to care about Google+ shutdown is key to sounding really technical, but the truth to pretending about anything, is a good list of things to pretend to care about. Like Yoga!
Who doesn’t have a yoga time in their life?
Pretending to care about yoga is about as hip as it gets but to be full granola, you need to do at least 30 days straight, and share your adventures each day. Perfecting one pose is key to building a brand to giving a shit about yoga.
Being proud of doing nothing, in a picture, is really fun.
Watch how this yoga champion does nothing.
Make sure the image has a better view than your yoga skills, and you will always be the best on your instagram feed!
Benefiting your body with each movement, capturing it, and pretending yoga is your life for a few months will probably capture the attention of your relatives and closest friends!
#3 Pretend to care about yourself
Pretending to care about yourself is easy when you finally stop procrastinating about doing yoga.
Pretending to care about yourself is a great way to get social acceptance really quickly!
Be sure to blast out a lot of random shit to your friends and family over your cellphone.
Pretend others care about you caring about yourself!
If they are next to you, text them about how much better your day is than most people that are near you. But it’s good to have them near you.
Nothing says you’re having a good day like staring at your phone for an endless amount of time, without any thought about when the last time you took a break from facebook.
In an elevator? Get on your phone and tell someone about how great your day is and show them something you can do.
In the car, get on your phone and tell people how good you look.
#4 Pretend to care about other people
Find a quick minute to post about something, that implicates you in a good light. Drop politics, voting, all that important stuff – keep it simple. If you get a chance to update your facebook picture to something helpful looking, you’re gold for a few months.
Pretend you care about someone else, and sing a song for them.
But it’s really about the picture, and you don’t know anything about playing music.
When did caring about someone matter beyond the image, and if the image doesn’t happen, it didn’t happen. So that’s important to know before dealing with any non-image engagement. Screw that.
Nothing says you give a shit, like a picture of an old doctor.
You know I care when I have doctor eyes on you.
Look at my gold watch too, that screams I care about you, and your time.
Glad we had this important discussion. I’m married.
Post a hopeful picture on your facebook and pretend it’s you helping some old person, and say something like.
“It feels great to help others.”
#5 Pretend to care about a hipster.
Not all hipsters, just a hipster.
Wow, you don’t live in Austin do you.
Beards covering double chins are the new classic hipster.
Skinny jeans are comfortable but hey,… You damn hipster.
Let’s pretend hipsters are a big problem, and pretend we need to care about people who are super super hipster.
No not you, stock image hipster girl.
We are talking about all the hipsters that take a lot of time out of their week to prepare for practically zero interactions with people. But take an exuberant amount of time getting ready, preparing, and potentially exercising to the point that it’s considered weird.
Hipsters are equally as important as Google+ shutting down their entire social media forum.
Google is about as annoying as that annoying hipster person…
Deleting everything… lol
Come on now.
Deleting everything seems a bit rash.
But I understand, from a digital marketing perspective, it makes sense.